Reflections on Celebrating the Holidays

The first of a new year always invites reflection. I confess that I have been thinking about how I celebrate the holidays for several years. The traditional image of a tree loaded with gifts below it and the opening of the packages followed by clean up. Several trash bags filled with wrapping paper and ribbons, boxed and styrafoam peanuts now headed for the land fill. And in the alley all up and down our block there is an avalanche of garbage headed for the land fill. And yet there is no “away”. On our precious planet there is only so much space, clean air, pure water, fertile land and green forests. When these are fouled we all suffer.

I have lamented over the commercialization of the holidays. For me it is Christmas but whatever is being celebrated, the stores are filled with sales and the parking lots jammed with shoppers. I have never liked this part of December yet was I willing to change the only person I can change….myself?

It began six years ago. As a grandmother I realized that all our extended family had more than our share of wealth and things. I would search for the right gift for each person but more times than not, I would end up giving something they may or may not need or want. They would smile and thank me and appreciate the thought. But was there another way we might celebrate?

And then I learned about Chiapas, which is a micro-lending program where very small loans of $50.00 to begin with are given to a woman living on less than $2.00 a day. She is teamed with four other women. Together they agree that no one of them can receive a second loan until all four have repaid their first loan. So if a husband wants to take his wife’s money that was intended as a business loan to buy six chickens and start an egg business or some basket materials to weave and sell baskets, and he wants to take the money and buy beer, then four other husbands show up to persuade the intended beer drinker to return the money. In essence, a small group working as a team soon becomes five small businesses thriving on the synergy of each other’s support.

I loved this concept and wanted to contribute. What if I used the money I would normally spend on gifts for our family and instead, make a micro loan in the name of each family member? We could replace buying more “things” with giving each other the gift of hope. But would my young grandchildren understand? And would they join in a feeling of giving to others rather than adding in our own already blessed life?

I’m not sure why I worried because I was wrong. From the first Christmas every member of our extended family loved the idea. And now each year we enjoy finding worthy causes such as Greg Mortenson’s schools for girls he is helping to build in Afghanistan. He tells this story in his book, Three Cups of Tea.

This year was a refreshing new experience. There was no getting stuck in traffic in crowded shopping malls. There was no last minute rush. And no mountain of garbage after all the gifts were opened. The gifts were letters of love, expressing memories of gratitude and joy as we recounted to many blessings from each person’s life. And then mention of the gift being given in the name of the family member. “A woman and her family will have hope and a permanent way out of poverty in your name.” “Children will have a school where they can learn and have a hopeful future thanks to a gift in your name.” “Fifty Life-Straws will be given, each to a person who will then have clean, healthy drinking water for a year, as a gift in your honor.”

As Gandhi said, we must be the change we want to see in the world. I am amazed that I made lots of excuses and resisted in many ways, small and large. Yet in the end the gift came back to me. When I dared to believe it could be different and more connected to the kind of hopeful, peaceful world I long for, one where there is no poverty and everyone has a sustainable future, I could make a difference, one small gift at a time. And so it was!