Friday, March 26, 2010

PLUS/DELTA Feedback: A Breakthrough Tool for Personal Growth as a Leader (part 1)

One of the most interesting parts of my work is having the pleasure of doing a great deal of phone coaching and many years ago I began to set aside the last five minutes of a call to invite feedback for me. At the end of the hour I would ask, “I want to keep growing and improving the ways I support you and your growth. Can you help me understand what added value to this time together?” (PLUS) and “Where and how can I improve as a coach?” (DELTA) This has become a very valuable skill to encourage two-way learning. What I hear in that five minutes has transformed how I listen and coach.

By asking this question several times a day and to hundreds of people, I have discovered many benefits.
1. Trends appear that I cannot deny.
2. I’ve learned to tailor my style to each individual.
3. The person being mentored begins to take more ownership for change and begins to be more directive in other parts of the call.
4. I model Robert K. Greenleaf’s insight, that a true servant leader looks inside to bring change rather than outside to change others. And as we work on changing ourselves, our attitudes and short comings, others, through inspiration, begin to choose to change themselves.

The hardest PLUS/DELTA has been with my family. Yet not one piece of feedback has failed to be a special opportunity for growth and transformation. It does take courage and a good sense of humor! One of my funniest moments was when I asked my then 13 year-old step daughter what I could do to make her feel a sense of joy when she opened the front door at the end of a school day. ( A bit of background might help. Her mother had died unexpectedly 16 months previous and we both were struggling to create a trusting relationship.) Without missing a beat she responded, “Drop dead!” Well, that was a bit more than I was prepared for, so I asked for something easier for starters She then offered, “Don’t speak to me until dinner time.” That was even harder. I wouldn’t be able to say, Have you done your homework? Don’t drop your school books there. You need to practice the piano before dinner….all those important messages teenagers love to hear! But I gave it my best shot. After four weeks of not meeting the goal well (I had only managed 3 evenings with the results she sought-! And then, only because I had gone outside to garden or literally gone somewhere in the car) still, she was willing to celebrate with me. We announced my achievement at dinner with a special dessert to make the milestone.

To my amazement, as we were loading the dishwasher after dinner, she asked me what she might do to make my afternoons more pleasant. “I’m sure you aren’t too thrilled to see me after school. What can I do to make you glad I’m home?”

I said something like, “Oh no, I’m always glad to see you.” (Which wasn’t nearly as truthful as she had been.) But then I continued, “You and your father have an agreement that you will practice the piano each afternoon or else you have to pay for your piano lesson.” (And I was the observer to report whether she had or hadn’t honored her promise, not a good way to do it I’ll admit.) “What would make me the happiest would be for you to practice the piano sometime before dinner each evening so I could enjoy your music and share a positive report with your father.”

To my amazement she went right to the piano and practiced…and never missed an evening after that. I learned great humility and the power of changing myself first and only myself. Then others choose to change by inspiration and of their own free will as they are ready.

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

A Radical & Creative Shift: Transforming “Work” into Calling!

I was recently inspired by a story from an incredibly gifted member of our Virtual Servant Leadership Learning Community sharing her journey as she learns to create a life with abundant, vital energy as a norm. Midge Miles is teaching from our book, You Don’t Have To Go Home From Work Exhausted, and challenging herself to be a positive role model of what she is teaching. She is also daring to live calling by moving from the corporate leadership position she has held for decades to create her own business, www.thestoriedorganization. She entered our Virtual Servant Leadership Learning Community, with full support and funding from her corporate organization while making the transition - because she is so valued as a leader in the Fond du Lac community. Her story brought up these recent reflections for me.


Several years ago I decided that I would no longer work. If it was work, I wouldn't do it. As I "woke up" and emancipated myself from my oppressive self talk, it was astounding what happened. If the kitchen was a mess and I thought of it as work, I would turn away. And then I would think to myself, "but I love a clean, orderly kitchen." "Then perhaps you would enjoy bringing order to your kitchen" I would think quietly. And this was true. As I returned to clean my kitchen, I began to discover work as meditation, work as joy, work as purpose, work as bringing gifts into my life and the lives of others.
Day by day I would rethink my choices. And simply by reframing how I saw my life and each choice within it, everything began to change. Chores I used to dread I now scheduled in such a creative way that I could enjoy and take meaning from each one. Burying my vegetable cuttings gave me a few moments in the compost pile to feed the worms and give thanks for nature. When I would shop for groceries I would remind myself of the abundance in my life and how many people were starving with no resources where I had many. And if I had let reports and responding to emails stack up (and feeling like a “have to”) I would remind myself that I always have a choice. I can check out permanently and paint, garden or read. But wait! I thrive on my work and all I learn from those I serve. I would starve without the challenges we face together! This realization brings fresh commitment, energy and focus to any and all “chores” that are just part of delivering extraordinary support & performance to our Partners and Clients. I may well need a refreshing time out or joy break. But bottom line, it becomes crystal clear to me that the choice to do each part of my work to the very best of my ability is a huge privilege and honor!

This morning I woke up with an exhilarated feeling of "getting" to do so many interesting, challenging and meaningful things supported by a great team of Partners and Clients. My life is overflowing with joy and possibility. And when I hit the wall (as I do) I think of it as an opportunity to reflect and learn. Did I stay in one mode too long? Did I jump into a rescue rather than honoring a person to own their own challenges? Did I internalize problems instead of framing them as opportunities and being curious about what they could teach me? Did I tell myself I had too much to do to take time to renew? Simply by reframing the stories and assumptions I tell myself in my self-talk, my energy has made an astounding shift.

I must add that I am committed to wellness and walk three times a week, practice yoga 90 minutes most days, enjoy a vegan diet, meditate, make time for prayer and visioning, plan several joy breaks into each day, evening and weekend and stay aware of my energy so I can "recover" early should I be lagging. Robert Greenleaf was a great proponent of making sure we take time to step back so we can hear our deepest wisdom and inner voice.

This has been such a healing journey for me. I discovered that I was addicted to crisis and the adrenaline that creates. I would procrastinate and rationalize until I had a last minute crunch that would cause me to spring into action. What I learned was that I was in a state of lingering burnout and only felt alive when I had a fire to fight or crisis to deal with. In essence, I learned that I was an arsonist without realizing it. I created last minute challenges because it gave me a sense of purpose I had not yet discovered by planning well ahead and pacing myself. Learning to plan, step back, ask for help, harvest mistakes, invest in fun and high trust relationships...all this is like building blocks that began to create an amazing self- actualized life. From the outside one might say that I am working long hours. What they don't know is that I am enjoying my life in ways I never thought possible. And the "work" I am doing is pure joy, a pleasure and such an honor. I get to learn and share and grow with incredible people of all ages. As we change the ways we think about our lives, our hearts, our personal history and energy shift. When Gandhi said, "We must be the change we want to see in the world" and Greenleaf said that all meaningful change begins within, I believe they were both pointing to the act of becoming grounded in faith, hope and love. From this quiet, yet powerful and high potential energy all things are possible. [Further insight into this mind shift can be found in our book, You Don’t Have to Go Home From Work Exhausted by Ann McGee-Cooper & Duane Trammell]

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Culture Committee at Southwest Airlines, March, 2010

COUNT ON ME to OWN IT! is the theme for 2010 as Southwest Employees are pumped and ready to “kick tail” to stay out in front in their industry. Gary Kelly, CEO, challenged all of us in his recent Message to the Field to each bring our best self to this year as it promises to be yet another really challenging year to stay profitable with rising fuel prices.
Wednesday, Carol Haddock and I enjoyed the first of four all-day meetings with the SWA Culture Committee. This begins the 20th year we have had the honor of participating and experiencing tremendous change. For example, as a direct result of an Employee Survey two years ago, Colleen Barrett added a team of Culture Ambassadors, one for each major work group, to work full-time in support of their local culture. In all there are eight Ambassadors and they also help plan the Culture Committee Meetings.
One of the creative things they did last year was to design a Culture Passport for each of us. We get it stamped whenever we participate in a service/celebration event, such as the SWA/Ronald McDonald Dallas LUV Classic Golf Tournament to raise money for this charity, Message to the Field, appreciation events with a meal for the Maintenance Teams, packing over 3,000 goody bags to give out to the flight crew who work over Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays, etc.
They come up with a fun theme for each meeting and the 120 members are seated at tables so we meet new friends at each of the four meetings. This meeting was all about sports so there was football, baseball, volleyball, etc. We were asked to come in sports attire with T-shirts for our favorite sports team. We had members in tennis outfits and hockey gear and lots of funny stuff. One woman brought her kayaking paddle and gear. Carol came home with an official Green Bay Packer’s Cheese Head hat!
There is always a report from Kevin Krone, VP, Marketing, Sales and Distribution, and we get to see the new commercials. What is so cool is the Culture Committee is educated at each session about the complexity of the airlines business and why it is increasingly difficult to make a profit. What has always been so fascinating is that their motto and guiding principal is to “do the right thing”. So, for example, with Bags Fly Free, they are foregoing a lot of potential profit but not hassling their Customers with extra fees. And Customers obviously appreciate this. A significant number continue to switch to Southwest Airlines after experiencing being quoted a ticket price only to discover that there is an extra $120 round trip for baggage fees!
I sat at a table with two new “rookie” members of the tea, Kelly Tidwell & Tisha Hirsch, who had both worked at other airlines prior to Southwest. They both were so enthusiastic about getting to work at Southwest. One thing they both shared was the importance of Employees “self policing” to keep the culture strong. Both are flight attendants and they said they learned early that if someone on their crew was grumpy or not stepping up with a great Southwest Spirit, they would tactfully remind them that every Customer and every contact counts tremendously. If we want to keep our jobs secure we’ve got to come through with spectacular Customer Service! And that means a big smile and searching for creative ways to make every Customer glad they chose to fly SWA.
When you have this level of ownership from a majority of Employees who “get it”, you have something really special. And we can tell you that Southwest works very hard to make sure complacency doesn’t creep in.
At the end of the day we had seen several fun videos (some made on his own time by a very gifted volunteer, Bob Hurst!) We had lots of fun. Worked hard together on ideas for new, fun events for 2010. We made many new friends. And signed up to pitch in and help out with dozens of great celebrations and service events that will happen coast to coast! By keeping work fun and keeping Employees feeling appreciated and in on things, they keep the morale high for every Employee. Carol and I left really inspired and energized by the amazing spirit that keeps Southwest at the top of their industry!
Ann McGee-Cooper & Carol Haddock
P.S. If you haven’t already found it, go to www.southwest.com for more great stories about Southwest Spirit!


(This terrific video was produced by Bob Hurst, award-winning videographer for Southwest Airlines Culture Committee!)

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Outliers: The Story of Success filled with insights for Servant Leadership

All of us want to succeed, want our children to succeed and enjoy being a part of the greatest possible successes…winning the Super Bowl, working at one of the Best Places to Work in America, winning a Nobel Pulitzer Prize or a gold medal in the Olympics. We are thrilled to be the best, individually and collectively. So are there ways to increase the odds for extraordinary success so that anyone can enjoy the nourishing joy of achieving bold dreams? Malcomb Gladwell, author of Outliers: The Story of Success makes a compelling case for this encouraging possibility.
In stories that will fascinate all 4 quadrants of the brain he makes a strong case for :
- why winners are typically nurtured by an extended community (the importance of building that sense of team, family, support and belonging which strengthens the immune system as well as mental and intellectual health/social I.Q.)
- the tremendous advantage of persistence and the magic of investing 10,000 hours to unleash genius.
- how problems become opportunities for those who persist and dream bold dreams
- how our ancestral back ground play a far bigger role than we may have ever thought
- the link between rice paddies and high aptitude in math, and
- some blocking assumptions in American education that will startle you.

I read all this with a keen interest, keeping in mind our work teaching Servant Leadership and growing organizations (communities) that learn. Again and again his research confirmed the work we have been doing on nurturing genius in individuals and teams. We all are given gifts of unique genius. The question is not do we possess genius but rather, will we choose to own and apply it?
The role of mentoring clearly brings keen advantages to both mentor and mentee. The act of consistently thinking on behalf of another and finding ways to communicate feedback and coaching transform the breadths and depths of daily experience.
One of the most fascinating insights is the 3 qualities of meaningful work:
• Autonomy
• Complexity
• Connection between effort and reward.
Effective servant Leaders work hard to imbed these qualities in the ways work is assigned to those they supervise.
In a chapter on the ethnic theory of plane crashes, Gladwell describes how low or high power distance impacts effective communications. When we are taught to defer to superiors and obey rather than to challenge their orders, we limit the collective intelligence with serious consequences. One example of this comes in the case of airline pilots. You can quickly realize how automatic deference to authority and being rewarded for NOT challenging decisions or assumptions extends to any supervisor/ subordinate relationship and the probability of their successful teaming.
What I found most fascinating was the consistent role of “hard work” and “long hours” as a quality of success. Yet consistently, along with this mantra of long hours was personal passion or purpose. Bold dreams fuel our lives with purpose. And whether you are loading baggage for Southwest Airlines (working to achieve unsurpassed Customer Service with zero lost or damage luggage), answering emergency 911 dispatch calls for Carrollton Police Department (in the spirit of being the first voice to help a person facing a critical crisis be immediately supported by the right service) or monitoring the control room of a nuclear power plant (in the spirit of providing safe, reliable, affordable power for families and businesses to thrive), having a purpose larger than a paycheck or personal survival is key.
I’ve always been fascinated by the quote attributed to Henry Ford, “Whether you believe you can or you can’t, you are right!” Outliers provides refreshing new insights into ways we can expand our successes and claim bold dreams for ourselves, our work places, our community and our world.

Monday, March 8, 2010

Our Choice: A Plan to Solve the Climate Crisis, a new book by Al Gore

Anybody besides me feeling a bit overwhelmed by news about our planetary crisis and the impact of pollution on air, land & water and the many other issues being reported on? If so, I strongly encourage you to buy a new book, Our Choice: A Plan to Solve the Climate Crisis and withhold judgment until you have read it. There is a fascinating chapter explaining scientifically why our brains become paralyzed by the overwhelming nature of what is happening and why we then look away in denial or despair. Yet it also shares great examples of times when we as a nation and people rose up against huge odds and achieved the impossible, again and again. It is a book filled with hope and possibility.

If you care about the health of the planet and how our current life style will impact our grandchildren and their grandchildren, (and I know each of you do) I strongly encourage you to read, Our Choice. Make it a gift to your whole family. It brings us up to date on all the issues regarding how humans are impacting the health of our planet and what we can do.

Instead of beginning at the beginning, I encourage you to start with Chapter 17, The Power of Information. It is fascinating to learn how the web and technology are rapidly changing how we think and leveraging the power of information for good and for bad. It gave me great hope and I could see choices I want to make about increasing my learning curve as a participant and user of technology.

I was glad to read every chapter as each focuses on a different aspect of our planetary crisis, including: Our Sources of Energy, Living Systems, How We Use Energy, The Obstacles We Need to Overcome and Going Far Quickly. It is very thoroughly researched and presents all sides of each issue. But by far my favorite chapter is the final chapter where the author describes two possible futures, one if we continue the status quo and remain in denial. The other is a very, very hopeful vision of what could be. And as you get to the end, you will be totally convinced that we can choose to change and save our planet. He reminds us of our greatness and how many times we have faced overwhelming threats and turned a problem into an opportunity. For example, Pearl Harbor and WWII where every man, woman & child pitched in. I was 5 years old. I helped with our victory garden, recycled tin foil, knitted squares for blankets for soldiers and saved money for Victory Bonds. The Marshall Plan brought renewed hope to all of Europe and rebuilt the infrastructure which brought economic prosperity and good will.

This nation has a history of rising up to face huge threats and finding the courage and innovation to do whatever it takes. If you long to do the right thing for future generations, please do read this book. It transformed my sense of hope and provided the background on each issue so I can make choices as an informed citizen. I am convinced that we must find our collective will and act now. If not us, who? If not now, when? We are the ones given this challenge.