I was recently inspired by a story from an incredibly gifted member of our Virtual Servant Leadership Learning Community sharing her journey as she learns to create a life with abundant, vital energy as a norm. Midge Miles is teaching from our book, You Don’t Have To Go Home From Work Exhausted, and challenging herself to be a positive role model of what she is teaching. She is also daring to live calling by moving from the corporate leadership position she has held for decades to create her own business, www.thestoriedorganization. She entered our Virtual Servant Leadership Learning Community, with full support and funding from her corporate organization while making the transition - because she is so valued as a leader in the Fond du Lac community. Her story brought up these recent reflections for me.
Several years ago I decided that I would no longer work. If it was work, I wouldn't do it. As I "woke up" and emancipated myself from my oppressive self talk, it was astounding what happened. If the kitchen was a mess and I thought of it as work, I would turn away. And then I would think to myself, "but I love a clean, orderly kitchen." "Then perhaps you would enjoy bringing order to your kitchen" I would think quietly. And this was true. As I returned to clean my kitchen, I began to discover work as meditation, work as joy, work as purpose, work as bringing gifts into my life and the lives of others.
Day by day I would rethink my choices. And simply by reframing how I saw my life and each choice within it, everything began to change. Chores I used to dread I now scheduled in such a creative way that I could enjoy and take meaning from each one. Burying my vegetable cuttings gave me a few moments in the compost pile to feed the worms and give thanks for nature. When I would shop for groceries I would remind myself of the abundance in my life and how many people were starving with no resources where I had many. And if I had let reports and responding to emails stack up (and feeling like a “have to”) I would remind myself that I always have a choice. I can check out permanently and paint, garden or read. But wait! I thrive on my work and all I learn from those I serve. I would starve without the challenges we face together! This realization brings fresh commitment, energy and focus to any and all “chores” that are just part of delivering extraordinary support & performance to our Partners and Clients. I may well need a refreshing time out or joy break. But bottom line, it becomes crystal clear to me that the choice to do each part of my work to the very best of my ability is a huge privilege and honor!
This morning I woke up with an exhilarated feeling of "getting" to do so many interesting, challenging and meaningful things supported by a great team of Partners and Clients. My life is overflowing with joy and possibility. And when I hit the wall (as I do) I think of it as an opportunity to reflect and learn. Did I stay in one mode too long? Did I jump into a rescue rather than honoring a person to own their own challenges? Did I internalize problems instead of framing them as opportunities and being curious about what they could teach me? Did I tell myself I had too much to do to take time to renew? Simply by reframing the stories and assumptions I tell myself in my self-talk, my energy has made an astounding shift.
I must add that I am committed to wellness and walk three times a week, practice yoga 90 minutes most days, enjoy a vegan diet, meditate, make time for prayer and visioning, plan several joy breaks into each day, evening and weekend and stay aware of my energy so I can "recover" early should I be lagging. Robert Greenleaf was a great proponent of making sure we take time to step back so we can hear our deepest wisdom and inner voice.
This has been such a healing journey for me. I discovered that I was addicted to crisis and the adrenaline that creates. I would procrastinate and rationalize until I had a last minute crunch that would cause me to spring into action. What I learned was that I was in a state of lingering burnout and only felt alive when I had a fire to fight or crisis to deal with. In essence, I learned that I was an arsonist without realizing it. I created last minute challenges because it gave me a sense of purpose I had not yet discovered by planning well ahead and pacing myself. Learning to plan, step back, ask for help, harvest mistakes, invest in fun and high trust relationships...all this is like building blocks that began to create an amazing self- actualized life. From the outside one might say that I am working long hours. What they don't know is that I am enjoying my life in ways I never thought possible. And the "work" I am doing is pure joy, a pleasure and such an honor. I get to learn and share and grow with incredible people of all ages. As we change the ways we think about our lives, our hearts, our personal history and energy shift. When Gandhi said, "We must be the change we want to see in the world" and Greenleaf said that all meaningful change begins within, I believe they were both pointing to the act of becoming grounded in faith, hope and love. From this quiet, yet powerful and high potential energy all things are possible. [Further insight into this mind shift can be found in our book, You Don’t Have to Go Home From Work Exhausted by Ann McGee-Cooper & Duane Trammell]
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